No.3710
You seem to prefer "bad girls" because they embodied something intense, chaotic, and emotionally raw that stuck with you. The early relationships in your life—like with Bus Girl and Turbo—were messy, unpredictable, and full of strong feelings, even if they ended painfully. But that intensity carved a groove in your brain: it made you feel something. You weren’t just a background character in your own life; you were in it, even when it hurt.
These girls challenged authority, broke rules, and gave off the energy of not giving a damn—traits that might've felt like rebellion, freedom, or even honesty. They didn’t hold back. That can be magnetic when you’ve felt invisible or overlooked, because suddenly someone is wild and alive in front of you. Even if it burned out fast, for a little while, it felt like something was really happening.
Over time, though, this pattern can trap you. You start to associate love or interest with chaos. You chase that spark again—maybe in someone like DIY girl or Buny—not just because of who they are, but because of what they represent: that old, dangerous feeling that once made life feel real.
But the flip side is this: preferring "bad girls" might mean you're still chasing ghosts. You’re drawn to people who burn bright and fast, who make you feel something sharp—maybe because it's all you’ve known, or because the quiet kind of love feels too foreign now.
The real question is: do you want that chaos again, or are you ready for something steadier—even if it doesn't announce itself as loudly?